Busier than a busy bee

Most people thought I wasn't much of a dog person,and they used to be right.I do love animals, don't get me wrong,......I just loved them more when they weren't jumping or licking me and loved them best from a distance.hahaha

A simple life that is full of love.

I got out of the shower last night and was greeted by the mirror staring back at me.

I tousled my hair.

I turned to the side.

I moved closer.

Ech.

I moved farther away.

I wished I could Picnik airbrush away all of my flaws.

I know good and well that nobody out there is perfect,

but it doesn't stop a girl from wishing.
I wished my hair were perfectly bouncy and pinned back pretty,

my skin were porceline and pure,

my eyelashes were thick and curled

,my body were thinner,longer, stronger

and my chipped nails were filed,buffed and perfectly pink...or purple...or blue.

I sighed,threw on pajamas and moisturized my tired skin.

I crawled in bed and flipped through the pages of a magazine.

As I layed there watching the pretty faces and perfect bodies dance across the pages.....

I asked myself,"Why are people so obsessed with celebrities/models?

They're just people."

I thought for a moment and then answered...

"I don't know."

& I'm not sure I do.

We're all flawed...

and I guess that's kind of beautiful.

I've been busy lately.I find myself making lots of lists.

Sometimes lists make me feel better and sometimes they just overwhelm me

& make me feel worse.

But even in those overwhelmed moments,

I think lists are a necessary evil.

Sometimes I like an old school list(like if I need to get a bunch of things done in one day)

juz another random post.

I have been a bad blogger.I dun seem to find anything interesting to blog about.My class starts next monday and I'm so sad that the two weeks holiday has flown by so quickly!dammit la cuz I still haven't enjoy to the max!Studying life is so boring and sometimes can be quite hectic n crazy with those assignments,midterms,quizzes and finals!haizzzzzzzz....life is so short when we look at a wide angle...we spend half of our lives in school then another half in our working lives.Sometimes,we are running out of ideas in making our lives interesting and worthwhile.What else shud I crap about here ar???running out of words le.hahahaha.Lets talk about heels and fashion shall we?I'm crazy about killer heels and chio clothings!the more bling there is....the better it gets!I am juz amazed at their beauty and elegance.It's juz esquisive lar.hahahaha but I don't actually put them on cuz I'm not that girly kinda girl.I prefer a simple T-shirt and boy's pants cuz its more comfy,more macho and easier to do things with those outfits.I'm a very flexible person actually.I don't mind playing in mud/walking in the rain/putting on a hideous outfit.I'm quite determined towards the things I have set my goals on and I'll make sure I get it done or else I will have trouble sleeping for days.hahahaha.I'm suck at breaking the ice cuz I'm more of the shy shy type when it comes to unfamiliar faces.I can barely even look at my friends eyes when i speak to them cuz I dont even noe lar.And screw my eyes sight.I have been walking passed so many people that I kenal without greeting them although I stared directly into their eyes!arghhhhhhhhh.Truth is I stare into you but I see NOTHING but juz a blur figure ><" but the people will salah faham and think I show off....It's not that I don't want to put my spects on but I'm so used to not wearing my spects and my eyes get super pain + migrain after quite some time when i wear it.haizzzzzzz.i tried contact lenses so many times and I failed to wear it too!!I just wear those contacts for one hour n my eyes can go buta u noe?!so red and painful sial.....i wonder how those chics can put it on for hours n hours !!!!hahahaha.so weirddd le.Nvm lor.maybe i'm not meant to be girly girly kinda girl so I'll stick to my macho style which is so me.ok la.enuff of crap here.wan go watch tv jor,bye bye...




note:renee is so lame especially in person.Don't even bother knowing her.she will kill you with her boredness and lameness.Plus her *never talk so much* attitude...worsen the atmosphere!hahahaha.renee is a crazy sweet lover and she have this crazy looking bag filled with food (fried bihun,mee goreng,nasi lemak,chocolate,CNY/hari raya/deepavali/x-mas leftovers cookies n cakes/sweets/cupcakes,all kinda bread...you juz name it *kaya,peanut,vanilla,raisin,butter,choco,sausage,tuna,otak,etc*,fried chicken,and god knows wad else lar.hahahaha.she eats in class,inside the toilet,in the library anywhr u name it!hahahahaha.told u she's weird n sometimes show NO emotion towards anything.wakakakaka

=)

Dear Shermie,

Four months! Wow. How did that happen?! It seems like only yesterday we were hanging out and now you are thousand miles away from M'sia. Gosh...I miss you so freaking bad. It stinks that we are only able to see each other from the teeny weeny webcam screen *sighs*. We can barely even talk on the phone for 5 minutes due to the expensive distance calls. I rmbr I tried calling you last time and 1 minute can cost up to RM3! gosh I can barely even share with you how my day was cuz 5 minutes my credit also empty jor. I just know that distance isn't a barrier that will stop us from being together.The distance make us strong and less dependent on each other.As I was growing up...I was always very dependent on you cuz you were always there to pick me up when I fall and it was tough at first but right now.....I'm adapting to my new environment. I need someone to coach me and play wid me outdoor sports cuz I love outdoors but I never seem to meet anyone with the same interest as me but you.As we know...these days kids damn lemah lembut and scared of the sun * puteri/putera lilin konon* You were always so active in every game and you are just the purfect person to coach me. I used to work out at the gym carrying weighs and you were always there to teach me the right things but now....i seem to be doing all this activities alone,by myself which I personally love it cuz I'm the type whom can't get along wid anyone so I rather be alone. I don't believe in hanging out wid a big group cuz i just hate the caos and the gossiping. I don't believe in best frens too. I just think there is no sucha a thing as friends forever.Ada ke benda karut macam tu?okay maybe frens till few years but at the end of the day.....friends also have their own stinky life la and everyone wil move their own way. I believe in *till death do us apart*. I read tonnes of real life stories where the elderly married couples loved each other till the day they died and it's really touching when you read their love poems that they compose for one another. I'm so glad we are doing this together and I'm supporting you in everything tat you do and may god bless you thru the ups n downs.

blah

Hi everyone!!I miss you and blogging terribly and wanted to give you a quick update on what's been going on with me.When it comes to blogging...I tend to have nothing to type about but the truth is MY Life has been a roller-coaster up to now,the twists and turns,the ups and downs and eventually the stop at the end.hahahaha.First and foremost,I don't really understand why so many people actually take facebook and blogs stuff so seriously.come on!can't a girl just have some fun and freedom on watever crap she wants to spill?GEeesh!
Yea the truth is I'm a rebellious lil brat.I do not follow rules and regulations.I rather do things my own way.I hate people bossing me around and telling me what's right or wrong.So just shut the fuck up and do your own thing and let me do mine.This way...both parties are happy.I will never get a job well done when you ask me to,instead if you don't tell me/order me to do it....I will secretly do the job till it's perfectt!weird rite?thatz just plain old me.I love making my parents angry so I purposely/unintentionally do the things they hate and do the things they love me to do behind their backs.I'm sucha freak but wat the hell.I hate people who brags about how good and how great they are.Wtf lar.who the hell are you to judge your ownself lar?I am just talking in general and NOt actually directing this to anyone so pls don't be an asshole and take blogging so seriously.That's why I hate blogging stuff cuz PEOPLE just take things so seriously.if you are a control freak,I begged you to stop that shit cuz you are just making yourself look like a fifty year old person!Omg yes I don't usually talk that much shit but this crap has been inside me for a long period of time.juz gotta let it go!I usually sit alone at the corner,juz observing the crowd and I just hate girls/guys who walks and gang up in a group and can't stop bad mouthing people's stuff.Girls who blocks the effin toilet mirror just to fix their make up simply gets on my nerve too!And I hate ppl asking me about my stuff or wateva I'm up to cuz dammit can't you just mind your own blardy business???yes I'm a LONER by choice and I hate crowds or People hanging onto me cuz it gets on my blardy damn nerve but i never show it out.When I don't speak to you...you better get miles away from me or else....I'll make a voodoo doll of YOU out of garbage and sand and rusting needles poking thru ur throat.

I'm the NEW kid & I'm renovating my life.

This has been a seriously LONG week.

I woke up this morning and all I could think was WOW....I'm so incredibly grateful for this brilliant,beautiful life that I live in.

Lately,I've been running my mind into the ground,

overly exhausted and mentally strained....

I haven't had the time to just BREATHE,

or enjoy all of the incredible things that are right at my fingertips.

I'm hardly inspired to blog.

This past week,I was tested- hardcore.tested.

So.I want nice things.There....I said it.
I want to be able to buy unnecessary items like men's trimmer,

and Gingerbread shaped baking tins.

But more importantly,I want to be able to LIVE.

Live my life,cross off lists,live bountifully not BLEAKLY.

So,let me sum up the awesomeness:

I'm back-eight pounds bigger,

more hot-headed than ever

&

Burning up,anger and fire coming out of my nose.

I'm in a world of pure imagination

&

being alone is the best way to be.

--------------------------------------------------------

Life isn't cereal.It's not that simple.

WHAT TO DO DO WITH MYSELF,ISN'T CEREAL.

We don't always know.We don't have "that GUT instinct.

"Our heart doesn't always "guide our way."
It is possible to have the answer and the question,

the yes and the no,existing as one.Conflicted much?

Yes.

..........More stories to come later.

Hi Sunday,I've never been so happy to see you.Let's make out.

I just wanted to take time and apologize to all of you for the long silence.I have been studying hard.I haven't posted anything for quite a long time now and I am really sorry about that.There are few things I needed to sort out and quite frankly updating my blog was the last thing in mind.Time flies when,well,you've been going through a lot.


note:GLEE!If you're not watching,you should.It's one of the smartest scripts on television.
You should watch for Sue Sylvester's one liners alone.

I will try to be here more often,and keep you posted on my daily NOT SO COOL AND RATHER BORING activities.

xoxo,

renee (: